Wednesday, December 1, 2004

Adventures on the CTA, Back-Issue #1 -- Stupid Robber Tricks

Whenever a week goes by with no new adventures, I'll tell a story that happened in the past year. Eventually I'll run out, but that should take a while---it's the number of stories that inspired me to write this, after all. Perhaps the most disturbing thing I heard on the El was when three people got on the train and sat just behind me. The two directly behind me seemed to be a couple having quite a spat. As near as I can tell, ettiquette in these situations is to pretend not to notice. It was actually pretty annoying to have to listen to all of that, but it began to get interesting when the woman started complaining about how what they did was not how it went in the "dry run". Meanwhile the man was exasperatedly trying to explain to his lady friend that if she did not feel comfortable with things, she should have said so earlier. After a few more minutes, it starts to become clear that they are arguing over who's fault it was, exactly, that the robbery they had just committed ended up being a complete failure. Lady: Yeah, and now they have my description! Man 1: Now they have all of our descriptions! Man 2: Guys! Not on the train! I decided to get off and switch cars before they came to their senses and decided that they had to kill all the witnesses. Unfortunately, when I got off I was not in cell phone range in time to report this, but I suspect with this level of competence, they'll be caught soon enough.

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